Archive for the ‘Uncategorized’ category

Rod Blagojevich Sentenced to 14 Years in Prison For Bad Hair Piece

December 8th, 2011
Rod Blagojevich

At least his hair looks...good?

Rod Blagojevich, the former Illinois governor whose three-year fight against criminal charges became a topic for hot debate, was finally brought to justice Wednesday, when he was sentenced to 14 years in prison.

But, for what, really?

Despite his 18 “more serious” convictions, including a charge that he attempted to appoint someone to President Barack Obama’s Senate seat in exchange for monetary compensation, Ryan Staldin, CEO of MFMWHP (Men For Men With Hair Pieces), feels their is a deeper rooted issue here.

“Obviously he did some other shit, I’ll give the courts that. But this stuff is going way back, man. It’s been three years of our boy Roddy being mocked and ridiculed for some – what we believe to be – ridiculous fabrications, “Staldin said. ” But the big thing is that this honest, trustworthy guy was thrust into the national spotlight and drenched with the nation’s “hate baldy” saliva. Or whatever.” » Read more: Rod Blagojevich Sentenced to 14 Years in Prison For Bad Hair Piece

Responsibility | Response to Hate Male

May 13th, 2011
Drink to Us

Drink to Us

Responsibility.  Why are we taking this?  Your quiet desperation thunders inside while you wish you’ve had more courage in the past.  You most likely blame this on someone and we hope it’s not the person you know you can be, but just,…

Business guru Brian Tracy says, “The difference between winners and losers is that losers do what they want to when they want to do it.  Winners do what the have to no matter if they want to or not.

CHANGE – (not Mr O’s change, but change itself)

Don’t Force Yourself into something you don’t want to do, but agree with yourself that sometimes change is a good thing.  Think about what you can change.  Inspire yourself and focus on the truth.  You’ll feel better knowing that you’re not alone in your quest to become great.  Some people don’t realize how valuable they are.

Buy LGO a BEER if you care (every time someone buys us a beer, we write another post)

Fail Clone Post Number 2 | Knee | Updated

November 23rd, 2010

I just had to post this on here,.   This guys form is terrible and he shouldn’t have been in this sport in the first place.  Please send the hate mail.

It seems that this is a popular injury and I don’t know why this makes me laugh, it just does. » Read more: Fail Clone Post Number 2 | Knee | Updated

Help Save Laughing Gas Online

August 1st, 2010
Donate Online

I Hate Myself

Yes, You have the chance to donate to a worthy cause today.   We need to eat.  Of course the money isn’t going directly for the purchase of food. (although some of it ultimately will)  We need money to purchase servers, writers time, and forward network activities.

And of course we will piss some of it away on random crap.  I guess that’s not really building a good case for us, but if you’ve read more than this article you know we’re not wired right anyway.

Thanks for Reading.  Donate if you care. » Read more: Help Save Laughing Gas Online

Endophthalmitis | Site Wanted

June 25th, 2010

He Caught a Left

Intraocular surgeries are always a blast when they’re an accident. Those interested in treating eye problems could look into getting a time machine. The punch line being that when your eyes are fuked up they’re not coming back online.

Itchy scratchy dry eyes that lack motorization are sometimes the worst.  I’ve personally found that when I even think about this stuff my eyes get funny.  I resist the urge to touch my eyes because I’m always questioning the cleanly nature of my hands.

Ask yourself right now.  SELF, HOW DID I GET HERE?

How many times have you been warned that something would poke an eye out?   Never going to give you up,. Never going to let you down,.

50 Famous “Would be” One Liners of Sara Palin

April 14th, 2010

Sara Palin is coming back into the main stream ridding the wave of her new FOX program.  I don’t watch FOX so I don’t know the name of it, but who cares.  Less importantly, The former Republican vice presidential nominee attempted to pose as  a standup comic on Jay Leno’s “Tonight Show”, dropping one-liners about the White House, Congress and Fey – the “Saturday Night Live” star known for her impression of the former Alaska governor.

Palin told Leno’s audience she planned to speak at a gun-rights convention: “Be there or else,” she lamely warned them.

She said Alaska is different from California.  In Los Angeles, “when people have a frozen look on their face, I find out it’s Botox.”

Here are some other other one liners that are funnier than her comedy efforts: » Read more: 50 Famous “Would be” One Liners of Sara Palin

How To Dress Like Bret Michaels

January 11th, 2010

HOW TO DRESS LIKE BRET MICHAELS

1. Hair must be long in the back (use extensions, Bret does) *extra credit for bleach blond
2. Hair must be tied back with a bandanna. (be sure to keep it wide minimum 4″)
3. Hoop Earrings (the more the better, both ears minimum)
4. GuyLiner GuyLiner (take your girls black eyeliner and do four to eight strokes underneath your eyelid)
5. Bracelet and/or Watch (bling)
6. Tight Jeans (bleached) *extra credit for holes
7. SUPER Tight Brand Name Tee-Shirt (I actually used my wife’s tee-shirt for this picture
8. (Optional) Cowboy Boots
9. (Optional) Cowboy Hat
10. (Optional) Shiny Belt Buckle

If you can put this list together, go out and be Bret Michaels for the night. You WILL NOT regret it.

Here are some photos of me at the party.

Unskinny Bop

I'm Bret Michaels

Both Bret and I have a double chin

PS- If you send me your picture dressed up like Bret Michaels I WILL post it here on Laughing Gas Online.

Mullet Junky.Com

December 19th, 2009
Mullet Junky Rocks

Mullet Junky Rocks

If “Mullet Junky” doesn’t say it all you need to visit www.mulletjunky.com

It’s good for at least 2 hours of laughing at other peoples, “Business in the Front, Party in the Back?”

Why?  “I just can’t make up my mind between short hair,. and long hair.”,. “Why don’t I have them both?”

below are a few teaser mullet photos from the site.  I’d like to see a site of

American Art

American Art

this caliber do celebrity hairpieces .  Enjoy!

Girl Mullets

Girl Mullets

The "Pervy Skull Mullet" aka "Skullet"

The "Pervy Skull Mullet" aka "Skullet"

The Mulletino

The Mulletino

Stephen Colbert vs. Chuck Norris – Quick Breakdown

November 3rd, 2009
Round House

Chuck's Rooundhouse, Can Kill a Husky

Slow Down, I know what you’re thinking.  Chuck Norris with one quick round house kick would Texas Ranger Stephen in two seconds flat?  Maybe twenty years ago.

stephencolbertsuperhero

Stephen, With his sword of Truth

Now, Today, Stephen Colbert is a spry 45 years old and Chuck Norris is 65.

 

That’s a twenty year age difference and anyone who watches professional fighters knows that even a year or two can make or break someone’s chance of winning.

chuckvsbrucelee

Chest Hair, Ouch

Chuck Norris still stays in shape with his total gym, but it’s not like Stephen doesn’t work out as well.  Remember, lets look at Chuck’s record.  Sure, he’s had some wins?  Well, at least in the movies where he’s pretend beating up jokers.  In real life, Bruce Lee owned Chuck.

You say, “That was Bruce, and he’s bad ass in his own right”, but did you know about Chuck’s humiliating loses to Joe Lewis and Allen Steen?  Did you know about his loss to Louis Delgado. On November 24, 1968?

Chuck Norris Homless

It Would be Cool to Get RoundHoused By Chuck

Of course Chuck ended up avenging most of his losses and I’m a huge fan of his past accomplishments, but I have doubts that he could take Mr. Colbert.

DNEWS CHAFFETZ.CIT

Chaffetz Loses By Decision Against Colbert

Stephen is no stranger to physical contests.  Earlier this year he leg wrestled and beat one of his long time opponents.  Stephen has a huge gang of followers.  I’m not saying that Mr. Norris doesn’t have any fans, but has he ever been ordered to shave his head by the president?

stephencolbertsweetness

Sweetness

If You’re doubting that Stephen would have a chance, don’t forget about his .38 revolver “Sweetness” that Stephen carries on him at ALL Times.  If you read into Stephen’s past you’ll see that he’s had a hard life, and I’m not going to get into details because this is a comedy blog, that would be over the line.  We can argue a good case for Stephen, but who knows, Chuck might be able to take him?  I really don’t know.

tolietpapperofchucknorris

Toilet Paper of Chuck Norris

Chocolate Rain, Why was it so Popular?

October 30th, 2009
With_Terra_Naomi

Tay Zonday w/Terra Naomi

First- Lets start with over 60 MILLION hits on youtube.  That’s like the population of Texas watching THREE TIMES.  So there’s no doubt that this was popular.

Tay Zonday is a People’s Voice Award-Nominated, Youtube Award-Winning, Webby Award-Winning singer with 60 million video views on Youtube.

I don’t really want to get into this guys story, but he’s a “made man” from the song below:

Lets Finish with the Lyrics:

Chocolate Rain
Some stay dry and others feel the pain
Chocolate Rain
A baby born will die before the sin

Chocolate Rain
The school books say it can’t be here again
Chocolate Rain
The prisons make you wonder where it went

Chocolate Rain
Build a tent and say the world is dry
Chocolate Rain
Zoom the camera out and see the lie

Chocolate Rain
Forecast to be falling yesterday
Chocolate Rain
Only in the past is what they say

Chocolate Rain
Raised your neighborhood insurance rates
Chocolate Rain
Makes us happy ‘livin in a gate

Chocolate Rain
Made me cross the street the other day
Chocolate Rain
Made you turn your head the other way

(Chorus)
Chocolate Rain
History quickly crashing through your veins
Chocolate Rain
Using you to fall back down again
[Repeat]

Chocolate Rain
Seldom mentioned on the radio
Chocolate Rain
It’s the fear your leaders call control

Chocolate Rain
Worse than swearing worse than calling names
Chocolate Rain
Say it publicly and you’re insane

Chocolate Rain
No one wants to hear about it now
Chocolate Rain
Wish real hard it goes away somehow

Chocolate Rain
Makes the best of friends begin to fight
Chocolate Rain
But did they know each other in the light?

Chocolate Rain
Every February washed away
Chocolate Rain
Stays behind as colors celebrate

Chocolate Rain
The same crime has a higher price to pay
Chocolate Rain
The judge and jury swear it’s not the face

(Chorus)

Chocolate Rain
Dirty secrets of economy
Chocolate Rain
Turns that body into GDP

Chocolate Rain

I’m personally just not that impressed.  What do you think?